


I'll Miss You

by Vantasassy



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, I don't know, M/M, interpret as you will, it's sort of Kagehina?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-07
Updated: 2014-08-07
Packaged: 2018-02-12 03:33:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2094132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vantasassy/pseuds/Vantasassy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>That boy always was one to stand out from the crowd – always was one to be noticed, to be loved, to be seen and heard and surrounded by people. Kageyama was the opposite. He was a shadow – all dark colours and sharp edges. He wasn’t meant to stand out, wasn’t meant to be noticed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Miss You

_I told you I would make you invincible._

  
Kageyama stared down at the ball in his hands, blue eyes blank, bland, dull. He could hear the cheering and the celebrating from his fellow classmates outside the gym walls, making the most of their freedom from High School and the start of their college lives.  Kageyama could swear that if he listened close enough he could pinpoint Hinata’s voice above the noise of the rest. A smile twitched his lips, eyes still trained on the ball. That boy always was one to stand out from the crowd – always was one to be noticed, to be loved, to be seen and heard and surrounded by people. Kageyama was the opposite. He was a shadow – all dark colours and sharp edges. He wasn’t meant to stand out, wasn’t meant to be noticed.

  
He swallowed, grip tightening.

  
_I told you I would make you invincible._

  
_And I did, didn’t I?_

  
_You’re invincible._

  
There was a weight settling itself across Kageyama’s showers, pressing down and causing his eyes to sting in a way that caused his throat to clog and his knees to shake. He blinked, trying to will the moisture from his eyes. His jaw tensed, top row of teeth grinding over the bottom set as he tried to reign in the emotions that were threatening to spill over.

  
It felt as if the last few years had been nothing but a dream, and now he was waking up to the painful reality that nothing had changed since middle school. Nothing had changed at all. Because he was still on his own – he was still alone on the court. Having a team that was there no matter what had been an illusion – a false hope that Kageyama had clung too, been blinded by.

  
And now his vision was clearing.

  
_I told you I would make you invincible._

  
_And I did, didn’t I?_

  
_You’re invincible._

  
_But now what?_

  
_What about me?_

  
Kageyama should have come to his senses when the third years left – when Suga, Daichi and Asahi left the court to go off on their own adventure. Left the court to _grow up_. But Noya and Tanaka were still there, and Kageyama kept living the lie, day in and day out. And then Noya and Tanaka slowly faded away, and it was just the first years that had kicked everything into motion. It was just the first years that had started this whole thing.

  
Only those first years were now third years, and it was almost time to wake up from their dream.

  
_You don’t need me anymore, right?_

  
Hinata had gotten a scholarship.

  
Amongst all the other players, he was the one who was noticed and scouted. He was the one they offered one of their sought after places to. No-one else. And Kageyama wished he could be mad – wished he could be jealous, and hate Hinata, and say ‘He doesn’t deserve it’ – but he couldn’t. Because Hinata did deserve it – more than anyone. If Kageyama had a list of people he could choose from to have such a great opportunity, it would be Hinata, even if his own name was on the list.

  
_I wanted to make you invincible._

  
_I wanted this._

  
_I just..._

  
His vision was blurred as he lifted the ball – moving up into that all too familiar position. His palms rested on the underside of the volleyball, knees and elbows bending slightly before straightening as he moved up, up, up, up. The ball left his hands, angled backwards, and he watched as it soared over his head.  
I wanted to be the one who kept you invincible.

  
_I wanted to stand next to you._

  
_I wanted to keep tossing to you._

  
_I wanted you to..._

  
_I wanted you to keep spiking my tosses._

  
The sound of plastic smacking against plastic echoed throughout the gym. Kageyama looked over his shoulder, watching the ball bounce one, twice, before merely rolling across the floor of the court. The tears he had struggled to keep back spilled over, silently rolling down his cheeks and to the tip of his chin, his mouth parted somewhat. Slowly, he turns his head back to look at his hands, tears dripping onto his palms.

  
_But it’s just going to keep being like that day._

  
_I’m going to turn around..._

  
_And no-one’s going to be there._

  
_“Kageyama!”_

  
Said boy snaps his head up at the excited call of his name, watching as Hinata freezes in the doorway, obviously catching sight of his friend’s tears. The orange haired boy walks forwards slowly, shaking his head with a fond, sad smile.

  
“Are you really that sad about leaving?” The boy asks, sighing afterwards and grabbing hold of Kageyama’s shoulders, brown, determined eyes locking with watery blue ones. “Come on, be excited! We’re going to University together, aren’t we? It’s going to be amazing. You should be happy, not sad.”

  
More tears just roll over.

  
_I didn’t get accepted to university._

  
Kageyama acts before he thinks, reaching out and pulling Hinata close to his body, hands gripping tightly at the back of the boy’s shirt. His head dips, burying itself in Hinata’s shoulder as he grits his teeth against sobs, tears still freely rolling down his cheeks. Hinata blinks in surprise, arms freezing in mid air before he tentatively wraps them around Kageyama’s neck.

  
“Oi, what’s gotten into you?” He whispers, but there’s no malice in the words.

  
_I told you I would make you invincible._

  
_And I did, didn’t I?_

_._

  
_._

  
_You’re invincible._

_._

  
_._

  
_But now what?_

_._

  
_._

  
_What about me?_

_._

  
_._

  
_You don’t need me anymore, right?_

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted to make you invincible._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted this._

_._

  
_._

  
_I just..._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted to be the one who kept you invincible._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted to stand next to you._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted to keep tossing to you._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted you to..._

_._

  
_._

  
_I wanted you to keep spiking my tosses._

_._

  
_._

  
_But it’s just going to keep being like that day._

_._

  
_._

  
_I’m going to turn around..._

_._

  
_._

  
_And no-one’s going to be there._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
_._

  
“I’m going to miss you, Hinata.”

**Author's Note:**

> To give some background, the idea is that Hinata got scouted but Kageyama didn't, and he didn't have the best grades, so he couldn't get into University. But he and Hinata had been planning on going together, and Kageyama was too ashamed to admit he didn't get scouted, because Hinata was so excited.


End file.
